The Bravery to Break Free
Author: Choy Yuki
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When we’re born, our family is like a habitat that we adapt to survive in. It may not be the environment that we would thrive most in, nor is most suited to our needs, but it is the one that we had to navigate. For example, in a family where arguments were constant, you may have felt like you had to either dominate and fight to win or remain silent and agreeable to avoid conflict.
However, the rules of the outside world. But we stick to the same strategies, and they end up hurting us. Continuing those old patterns can impact our relationships - making us act more aggressively than we mean to, or being overly tolerant when we shouldn’t be, especially in our friendships or romantic lives. We don’t know how to act or struggle to receive and give love in healthy ways because we never experienced it to learn it. This then limits our potential for fulfillment and happiness.
But we can change things with a little self-reflection and growth. If we recognize these patterns, we can break free of them. For instance, if you tend to be overly aggressive, consciously try to be 5% more patient and understanding every day. We can’t choose the environment we were born in, but we can choose to be different.